


take my hand, take my whole life, too

by bardingbeedle



Series: can't help falling in love [3]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Fluff and Angst, Implied/Referenced Character Death, M/M, Post-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-21
Updated: 2018-11-21
Packaged: 2019-08-27 02:57:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 929
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16694119
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bardingbeedle/pseuds/bardingbeedle
Summary: “You’re thinking too much again, Stark."





	take my hand, take my whole life, too

This is how their last kiss goes. 

Steve’s stunning, even now. More so, really. His hair loose and golden against the rocky backdrop of Vormir, his face strong and rigid, framed by the brownish-orange gleam of the sky. His eyes are a darker blue than normal. 

But Tony knows that’s not because of the low light.

He’s frozen, staring at Steve. His eyes are dry and itchy; he doesn’t want to blink. He doesn’t want to have Steve out of his sight for a minute, for a  _second_. He  _can’t_. He can’t. 

Steve moves toward him, slow, sure. Steve moves toward him as if he was in their bedroom, years ago, with a tired smile and open arms, craving Tony’s warmth. Steve moves toward him, and Tony is reminded of how unfair this is, how much time they’ve lost, how much time they have left. 

It’s not enough. 

What  _is_ enough (or what should be, it  _needs_  to be) is the way Steve’s eyes are filled with love. The way Steve cups Tony’s face in his hands, rough and calloused and dirty. The way Steve runs his eyes all over Tony’s face, lingering on his lips. The way Steve presses closer to Tony, until Tony can feel his intense warmth, until Tony can smell Steve’s scent. The way Steve brushes his thumbs over Tony’s eyelids, lingering on Tony’s long eyelashes; an old habit from before. Even for this, Tony is afraid to keep his eyes closed for long. But he allows it, for…for old time’s sake, maybe.

Steve leans in, and Tony resists the urge to jerk back. Resists the urge to bang his fists against Steve’s wide chest, resists the urge to scream and yell and  _break_ , because this is  _bullshit_ , this is not how it’s supposed to go. This is not how it’s meant to end. Not like this, not because of Thanos or any other fucking reason, this was never supposed to happen-

Steve leans in, and his eyes slide close, his eyelashes a light yellow against his skin, a soft smile tugging at the corner of his lips. He leans in, and kisses Tony slow and sweet, as if they had all the time in the world, as if they weren’t here. As if they were just Steve and Tony, again, like they once were. 

Steve kisses him, and Tony is afraid, he’s so terrified of closing his eyes, of missing this, he tries, he’s trying so hard to memorize this, to commit this to mind, he’s so, he’s, _he needs to_ , oh god, because he, he needs to remember, needs to have this embedded in his memories, because he knows that this won’t last forever, it’ll only be minutes, seconds at most, he needs, he  _needs_ -

“You’re thinking too much again, Stark,” Steve murmurs against his lips, pulling back an inch. Tony can feel his smile, can feel how fragile it is. Tony wants to cry, but Steve kisses him again, and Tony wills himself to get lost in it (he can’t, not really, but. But it needs to be enough). 

Tony closes his eyes, and knows he will regret doing so for the rest of his life. Because he feels Steve pull away, and by the time he opens them again, Steve is too far to reach, to feel.

Then he’s gone. 

—

This is how their first kiss goes. 

Tony is so handsome. Steve’s always thought so. 

In this moment, Tony looks  _gorgeous_ , really, hair soft and wavy, long enough to comb through. His eyes bright, focused on his tablet, and his figure on the couch is illuminated by the bright morning sun coming from the high windows of the living room. 

He’s frozen, at the very sight of Tony. He’s struck by how much he loves this man, and suddenly, his feet are moving on its own. He stops as Tony looks up, a smile already forming on his face, Steve’s name on his lips. 

Steve leans down, his hands coming up to carefully hold Tony’s face, and Steve sees Tony’s eyes widen before he closes his own.

He wants to savor this, commit every detail to memory.

He leans down, and feels Tony inhale quick and deep and shocked, and Steve takes every ounce of bravery he’s ever felt, every bit of courage and stubborn fight-me attitude he’s got pent up, and goes for the gold. 

Tony’s lips are soft, if a little chapped, but perfect. It’s perfect. Tony’s perfect, and Steve loves him, so much. It hurts. It will hurt so much more, Steve thinks, and he feels the tendrils of fear and guilt stretch up from his gut, threatening to disrupt this moment. He pushes it down, and feels Tony kiss him back. 

For now, this is perfect. This is enough, it’s more than. It’s everything to Steve. 

Steve opens his eyes slightly, sees Tony’s furrowed eyebrows, and pulls back an inch. “Stark,” he grins, murmuring this against Tony’s lips, “you’re thinking too much.” 

Tony huffs, and Steve takes his lips again.

Steve closes his eyes, and knows he will remember this for the rest of his life. Because he feels Tony press against him, closer and closer, feels Tony’s hand wrap around his neck, gripping him tight, feels Tony’s goatee tickle his chin, feels Tony’s tongue slip into his mouth, feels Tony’s chest against his, heartbeat fast and loud, feels Tony’s lips on him more incessantly, kisses turning more desperate and fervent, wilder and hotter-

He’s a goner, Steve thinks. Tony will be the death of him.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! <3


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